I have lived a lifetime of abuse and eating disorders and now I am writing a blog to help me connect with others who have gone through similar traumas. I want to be a part of the community of support. Writing for me has always been an invaluable tool of self expression, perhaps, the only one that goes unmoderated. Please write and say hello!

Monday, November 10, 2008

So Many Possible Titles...

I could call this entry many many things:

I Now Belong to Two Gyms

Why Jobs Suck

Why Teaching Sucks

Why Having a Large Belly Sucks

Why I Hate Food

Why I Only Appear to Associate with Food

Why is it that I continue to shovel food in my mouth when I'm already in physical pain and have a hard time breathing?

Why? Why? Why?

Where did Monday go?

How the hell am I going to have parent conferences tomorrow when I barely know these kids?

What the fuck 'suit' am I going to put on this swollen gut that won't send me into panic attacks?

How the fuck am I going to get rid of this weight?

But instead, I will say, tomorrow is another day.

Right?

I need a change. My behaviors right now are repetitive and destructive. I seem to only have one good day a week.

I don't quite know what the next best move is. I just don't know.

I want to find a DBT Skills group here in DC. I will have good health insurance that starts Dec 1. So maybe then...

Here's to you guys!

love ya,
A

2 comments:

Feisty Frida said...

Hello friend. I just wanted to stop by to let you know I'm still here.
Love,
Frida
xoxo

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